A littil note on confidence

Here's the thing about posting regularly. Sometimes you get distracted with other things. Yup, other things. I would not be doing this right now if I hadn't been sick and didn't have to stay in bed. I'd probably be playing games or brainstorming how to rule the world or eating dabeli. Cuz that's what I do.

How does one always stay confident? Confidence comes from preparation. Confidence comes from foresight. Foresight in turn comes from preparation and experience. Experience comes from preparation. Goals are important. When I don't have a goal, I do random things. Doing random things isn't necessarily bad. But at the end of doing a random thing, I don't get the same amount of happiness and fun as I get from achieving a goal based on unbelievable strategic execution. Yes, it definitely is as badass as it reads. The more happiness I get, the more fun I have, the more confident I am. So if at any time I find myself unconfident, I guess I could fall back and see if I've prepared for a goal.

I am thankful for the friends I have. I feel I have made good choices in terms of my company. I see clear hearts around me which is very refreshing.. Yes, there are times of discontent and frustration. At times like this, it is important that I realize I am responsible for my own state of being. I admit I am the only one responsible and I am the only one that will be able to change. Only I can make it better. Only I can motivate myself.

Knock Knock

Its just been a long time that’s all.
So then, what s your concern.

I am afraid I'll lose touch.
With friends and family?

Yea, I guess that'd be part of it.
What else?

I am afraid I'll lose touch with myself. I feel I am changing very quickly.
That can't be always bad..

Yea, its not bad. But it’s the feeling you get when you know you're stepping away from a mindset that has been established since a long time.
You're in a different setting. Ofcourse you will have to change some things about your lifestyle that connect you to the society around you. There's no reason to feel out of place about it.

But then, how much change is ok?
That's upto you to decide.

Wtf, that’s not the reply I want.
….

What do I do?
I don't see a problem.

I guess you start getting attached to the new lifestyle. And then you feel guilty about the attachment?
You're human, attachment is human, and change is seldom perfectly under your control. There is no reason to feel guilty for changing. You are not doing anything wrong. As far as I see it, you've still got your basics down and you're not defaulting on them. Don’t be afraid of change. Accept it, and work with it.

And what about the people back home? Family? Friends? Teachers?
They will always be there. You're still only 23, not 60.

And what about the whole "forgetting your roots" ordeal?
Are you doubting yourself?

No….maybe. I am not sure.
Don't doubt yourself. You know you will never end up in that place. Roots are deep. It's not easy to break away from them.

Am I doing anything wrong?
Are you?

Maybe.
Good.

Is there anything wrong with this picture?
Is there?

No.
Good.

Am I thinking too much?
Yes.

Well…?
Go do your work. Stop acting like a child. You've been built to perform. Get to it.